If you remake/reimagine/reboot/reconfigure/reinterpret it, they will come… or at least that’s the hope with 2018’s Suspiria. It’s Halloween film #26.
You all know the story, a girl from a Mennonite farm in Ohio leaves her dying mother and goes to Berlin to join an elite dance company and finds out strange things are afoot… Tilda Swinton and her posse of creep-o dancers, instructors, and hangabouts are up to something — what? Watch the picture to find out.
Spoilers abound below so if you haven’t seen the movie. This is your final warning.
Starring one of the greatest living performers Tilda Swinton (in three roles) and a whole mess of up-and-comers including 50 Shades of Gray’s Dakota Johnson, Chloë Grace Moretz, Mia Goth… as witches/dancers/psychiatry patients/pawns-in-the-game-of-life…
From the director of last year’s Best Picture-nominated Call Me By Your Name comes a flick that blends (or rather pulverizes) a bunch of elements that could work into a messy slop that isn’t arthouse enough to be arthouse nor is it giallo enough to be giallo.
I really wanted to love this one. I did not. You might, though! Pessimism abounds below… so here’s a #triggerwarning for that.
I can’t fully dismiss it — because it obviously is a huge piece and cost a bunch of money and was shot on film and there are some committed performances, but oye.
Come for a story about witches smashing the patriarchy, eye roll at the morality play about the banality of evil and the acceptance of fascism, skip the detective story that is set up because inept cops can’t do their jobs due to the wealthy suppressing the proletariat (?) or some shit like that, and… stick around for an unnecessary Holocaust drama/political allegory!
Bad psychiatry. Spooky journals a’plenty. Liquids everywhere. Solids – occasionally. Pointless nudity. More body fluids. Back-breaking. Witch hexing. Urine collection. Floor urination. Night hook-ups. Insinuation of urination. Voices in the night. Erotic dance sequences that are decidedly not erotic nor particularly better than the first round of eliminations on So You Think You Can Dance (which an ex-girlfriend subjected me to for 2 seasons). Satanic stuff. Hooks. Masturbation. Glorious shots of 1977-recreated Berlin. More hooks. Unnecessary terrorist subplot. Flagellation. A pointless reference to the actor who played the mayor in Batman (1989). A reference to an unmade Stanley Kubrick film. Lotta post-war chatter. Limbs being broken in every direction. Cocks. Balls. Vaginas. Breasts. Asses. Bad prosthetics. Good prosthetics. Rosemary’s Baby tonal cosplay. Dinner scenes. So. Many. Dinner. Scenes.
Never weird enough to be trippy. Never scary enough to truly qualify as a horror film. Never impressive enough to earn it’s punishing 2 and a half hour runtime. Not filled enough with dance to recommend it to fans of the Step Up series. The film wishes it had the sociopolitical heft of A Clockwork Orange (1971) or Metropolis (1927) or Sorry to Bother You (2018)… but, alas, friends… it does not. It’s a film about fascism and how easy it is to creep into our lives and this shouldn’t surprise you. I told you… spoilers abound.
A film for film students to open their jaws to and emulate poorly for a decade to come despite never being all that entertaining to begin with.
So as to not be needlessly aggressive to a movie that cost $20 million… let’s say that the production design is pretty good, the Thom Yorke soundtrack is good (but misused), and the locations fit the mood trying to be set.
The gore when present is … gory. The uh… conclusion, I suppose you can call it — in a film that eye-winkingly presents itself as being “6 acts and an epilogue”… you get what you get.
Tilda tries. She really does.
Heavily influenced by Fassbinder — so if you like quiet, boring misery this might be your picture!
The movie doesn’t give her what she needs… which is a better script.
The Q&A after the film with the director didn’t illuminate much. He said he always wanted to make horror films, but I have a hunch his knack/talent might be in a different zone. Seems like a nice enough fella. His passion seems to be there — but what he finds frightening/intriguing is perhaps a bit out of touch with modern sensibilities?
Spiritually, the conclusion reminds me so much of Hellraiser (1987) or The Void (2016) or Scanners (1981) in all the worst ways.
Is it better than the original Suspiria? No. But that’s because the original is a totally different movie in just about every regard.
Currently in theaters. See it at a matinee or cheaper if you can.
Recommendations for alternative viewing: Black Swan (2010), The Red Shoes (1948), Suspiria (1977)